When church does not feel like home

WHEN CHURCH DOES NOT FEEL LIKE HOME ANYMORE

WHEN CHURCH DOES NOT FEEL LIKE HOME ANYMORE

What do you do when you do not feel at home anymore in church?

You are in a situation when going to church feels like a burden than a thing of joy. You are beginning to wonder what the Psalmist was talking about when he said he was glad when they said unto him, let us go to the house of the Lord.  It is even annoying that every day, one worker in the church deliberately makes you mad.

Blessed are you if your pastor or close friend notices and even talks to you about it.

If no one does, then you are left with the thoughts of finding a new church that will make you happy.

For me, going to the church I worshipped, stopped “sweeting” me after year 1. I could not get the new pastor’s sermon, I could not relate with the new set of executives and I just felt out of place in the gathering of the brethren.

Earlier, I was the type of person who woke up early, boil water for myself and roommates so no one will have an excuse for not going to church. I will even get to church the time workers get to church.

Then later, the only thing that would make me go early to church was Bible study, and the Praise and worship session. Most of my friends that started the same church with me had the same problem. I think mine was even better, it even got to a stage they changed church. I could not at that time, I just had this strong feeling in my heart that my church was where God wanted me to be at that time so I had to keep enduring.

At a point I could not take it anymore, three last Sundays in a month I will go and on the first Sunday, I would go to church B worship. Church B was a big church in the campus with Sunday services outside school but weekly services on campus.  I felt at home there. I had many friends there, plus they had Holy Communion.

It did not take long, I realized I was going down spiritually. I was losing fire and oil. The only thing I was getting more was water.

Whenever I hear in my spirit, ‘Go back to …’ I will battle it; I will reply The Spirit

 “It does not matter the church I worshipped, what matter is that I am being blessed wherever I find myself.”

 When I told my other friends at Church B, that I think the Spirit is leading me to their church permanently, they were happy, they even encouraged me to join the workforce.

After one year I was like a lost sheep, I was thirsty and hungry after something different churches could not offer. After many prayers with some leaders in my life, I decided that I will go home.  Home was that place where God wanted me to be at a particular time to bless me in a particular way as I fellowship with a particular people. I stubbornly joined the workforce and I was put in a unit that made me cry on the day of ordination. Could it ever get worst?

Well, it got BETTER!!!

So if you are in that period of your life when church does not feel like home anymore, first and foremost, ask yourself what led you to that church in the initially, was it God or man?

Mine was divine, nobody ever invited me to Church A. I even had to disturb the pastor’s life to know when and where services held. Holy Ghost led me.

If it was the Spirit that led you there, then do not bother leaving until he says otherwise. If a man is the person that led you, then ask God if you are really supposed to be in that church.

Change of leadership could also cause this. Well…now I am used to this now because in my “school church” they change pastors every year, new leaders come in with something new.

Their sermons may be longer and they maybe borers, they may pray too much and you do not understand them at all. First realize that these people, as imperfect as they may seem, were chosen by God, you have no option but to summit them. Propose in your heart to love them, respect them, and submit to them as far as they are not teaching another doctrine.

I plead with you not to give room for offences, everyone is not perfect. Forgive people, do not leave your church because the pastor offended you or any worker offended you. It was shocking one day how one woman came to my church to share her testimony. It goes thus:

“I want to thank God for my life. Even though the church has not visited me in a long time, I want to thank God that I am still alive.”

 You can talk to an elder or pastor about it. Just ensure it is a genuine man or woman of God, they will advise you on what to do or better still pray with you about it.

I recommend you be a worker in the church too, it helps in building a better relationship with others in the church and it makes you more accountable and responsible. It also makes it easier for people to follow up on you, it puts you in a better position to change or talk to people who can change those things in the church that makes it not to be homely.

Try fellowshipping as frequent as you do before, this may be weird, and lastly, I recommend that you pray about it. It is as simple as that. Pray about “everything”. God is never tired of hearing.

I dedicated this to my dear friend who honestly confessed to me this morning that going to her church; the church she has been worshipping does not feel like home. I dedicate this to people suffering from a church they feel is loveless and to those who have left their churches because of anger, hatred, lack of innovations and others. 

FEEL FREE, LET US TALK ABOUT IT.

 By Munu OGHENEOCHUKO